Thursday, April 30, 2015

XO

It's one of those nights...those times when you find yourself thinking ...about the situation you're in...about the person you're missing. 

I know I shouldn't. It seems futile. I wanted to reach out. What's keeping me? 

It's kinna crazy. I'm watching soccer but it's like I'm watching a really sad movie. My team is not doing so bad but I am. 

I have work later. Double shifts. I had a long day earlier. More than a double shift it seemed. But I hate that I still have the energy to think. I thought that being busy today would keep my mind off things. Obviously I was wrong. 

I wanted to keep on driving earlier. But the body is tired even if the mind isn't. 

I shouldn't put so much into this. I know he hasn't. Well at least, I feel he doesn't. I guess that's what's eating me. Maybe I knew this was going to happen. I knew it was going to be temporary. But as much as I tried to prepare myself, I guess nothing can really cushion the pain. That too much drama? Well, it's not like I don't have feelings. 

The universe has reunited me with two assholes already. And then takes away someone I thought would be welcome reprieve. I was not expecting that he'd stay forever. But I really never thought that it would be this quick and would turn out this way.

My eyes are hurting really bad. But so does my heart. I'm so tired...

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